Memories for Her
by isabellaa.e.countoure
Summary: Haven't wrote in a long while let me know what you think. This is an origin story for Harley just my take. She strong and hes puzzled. Shes been through a lot and he likes pushing her through more. What secrets can you hide from the Joker? Sorry suck at summarys.
1. We met in an alley

**This is my first story in a long while. I figured I'd venture into the amazing world of Suicide Squad as many others have. I will be playing with the characters, yet sadly I don't own them. Boo. But if I did I'd be rich. It is a origin story for Harley Quinn and her roots with the Joker. In this Harley won't be another ditz or sex bot. She has strength to her. On with the story then. I reread this and tried to fix all the grammar issues. So sorry about that though.**

 **Harleen POV**

 _ **She left me. My roommate left me in downtown Gotham by myself.**_

 _ **I hadn't actually wanted to go out tonight. Especially after my father's gift had arrived. He sent me a gift, not as a graduation present but a reminder of the anniversary of my mothers death. I tried to stop the dark chuckle that threatened to escape my mouth. To many tears had been shed over that. It slipped out of mouth and shook the bones of the near bystanders. I enjoyed the almost deafening silence of the dark alleyway. Ever since I graduated from high school I didn't party, I didn't drink not after what happened, that one time. Everyone said it'll help you relax, but it didn't take long for me to be sitting in a corner reliving every moment of that night. Fortunately this time I was barely drunk and I could only hear the shadowy echo's in the deepest recesses of my mind that I had trapped it in.**_

 _ **My friend had "went to the restroom" about 3 hours ago and I had given up hope that she was even still in the club. I drifted over to the bystanders before stumbling into one of them. He sneered something before shoving me away from the group causing me to teeter on my 5 inch heels. I caught myself on the throbbing wall of the club I had left.**_

 _ **This time I couldn't stifle the giggle that slipped through my parted lips and before long it turned into a full laugh. A laugh that shook me to my very core. It felt so good to laugh after spending so many years in the past crying. It allowed me an escape from everything, my dad, graduation, stress, life. I suppose this is the clearest response I could give to my dad, laughing in his face. A response to the newest tape he had sent me of the night he had murdered my mother. I was officially, as of tomorrow, A Doctor of Psychology. The ceremony tomorrow had me at the top of my class, a honor I had worked my ass off for. I felt myself winding down from the laugh breathless and exhilarated. A thick, burly arm wrapped around my chest, while a hand shot out to muffle any noise from my mouth. The arms yanked me further into the dark alley, A voided area with a lonely street light that flickered briefly in and out. I could see small dim flashes of the man's beefy, hairy arms before his voice broke the silence that seemed to cling to this area so far away from the club.**_

" _ **Hey, Chuckles" he whispered into my ear. His breath had me gagging against his hand that was still there. I tried to jerk my chin out of his grip but that only caused him to grip tighter on both my chin and my flimsy club shirt. " Oh don't be like that, you want it, you all do". He growled out ripped my shirt. " You stay quite like, and I'll be-" The man ceased speaking. I glanced back in fear just in time to hear the metallic sound of a guns' hammer being pulled back. I nervously looked into the shadows, trying to look for my would be hero. The man behind me yelled into the shadows, "Who the fuck you think you are?" My eyes strained to adjust to the flickering light overhead, blinking furiously I could just make out flashes of pale skin, and just the barest flicker of neon green hair. I felt the frown pull at my face, none of that makes the slightest sense and yet a confident yet quiet voice spoke from the shadows. "Well, friend, I am annoyed that you're imposing on my turf, playing with young little toys that aren't yours to begin with." "Oh, Joker. I'm so sorry." The man behind me shuffles uneasily. He quickly dropped his arms from around me as if I had burned him. I dropped onto the floor of the alley way sitting for a moment. The man begins to apologize incessantly, begging his pardon while the Jokers' focus had already shifted to me. He walked casually over to me, leaning down he coaxed me to the feet. I stared up into icy blue eyes. My eyes drifted over his face, a J tattoo on his cheek, neon green slicked back hair, diamond stud earrings sitting in his ear lobes. A smile spread on his face and strangely enough I mirrored his action. His face took on a frown and he pulled me even further into the shelter of his arms.**_

 _ **The thug was still blubbering apologies causing Joker tilt his head at him, yet he hadn't moved his gun from its direction of being pointed squarely at the thug. "I don't appreciate you being here, nor do I appreciate you playing with My toys." Joker said in a cackling voice. He looked down at me, looked through me almost, and judged me. I could feel Gotham's cold wind through my ripped shirt, sweat dripping down my back, yet no tears graced my face. "Don't worry toots, I can put a smile back on that face." Without breaking eye contact, he pulled the trigger and effectively blew my attackers face off. Blood and brain splattered both of us, I could feel it running down me. Joker grinned down at me and quickly gathered me closer under his shoulder moving us down the still empty alley toward a street light. "So, toots, besides having fun with thugs, what do you do for fun?" I stared up at him as he practically skipped us down the block and to the left, further into downtown.**_ _I must simply attract psycos. I jokingly think to myself._ _ **No words seemed to come to mind. I stared up at him and started laughing, pure slightly unhinged laughter filled the surprisingly bitter July air. He turns me to face him and stopped us. "Something funny, toots?" anger lacing his voice . I quickly shook my head. "My thoughts made me laugh. I'm sorry I think alcohol broke my thought process." He nodded considering my words. " Well, toots, where's my thanks?" He asked tilting his head again, his eyes daring me, testing me. I tug on his arm which was still around me and pulled myself up to full height. I inched closer till I was but a mere 3 inches from our noses touching, "Thank you Mr. Joker. The last thing I needed today was to be raped, though it would be a fitting end. I appreciate you saving me." "Oh, toots. What makes you think I saved you? Maybe I just wanted you all to myself.?" He said shaking his head**_

 _ **He pulled away and once again looked me up and down. But I was already shaking my head. " You wouldn't have killed him if that was true. Maybe had him hold me down or even watch but no you killed him." I said it quietly. He frowned, shaking his head. " YOU presume to know me?" " No, it's just you would've already ditched me not kept with you. Maybe already have shot me." I said shyly. He growled, he hand snaked out quickly, like a cobra, and snagged my wrist tightly while the other pulled the gun and rested the still slightly warm and bloody barrel against my temple. " Maybe I want to see if your blood is just as red as his?" he whispered quietly into my ear. I turn myself to face him. "You saved me. My life is in your hand Joker." He frowned, his gun slid from my head to my shoulders and almost caressed my arm to my waist before is settled limply against my hip.**_

 _ **A large beefy man came flying from a near by alley " Boss, Boss," he panted out. I jerked into the Jokers arms, my arms wrapping around his chest. His gun had already leveled with the mans forehead as his free arm pulled me tight to him. The man quickly explained" Boss, he's close, we gotta go. Like real close." Joker nodded a smile graced his brightly painted lips. " Well toots, me and Bats have a game of chess to start. I'd say run but you haven't yet." His smile had anticipation written all over it. He nudged me towards the nearest subway stop. I frowned in confusion even as I felt something drape over my shoulders.**_

 _ **The next few hours passed seamlessly into the early morning. I had stumbled to the subway and was back at my dorm room before I really understood what had happened. I sleep walked into the room before falling into my bed face first.**_

 _ **I woke to a headache and my alarm blaring. I glanced around through barely open eyes. Frowning in confusion, I tried to concentrate on last night. My memories flashed but didn't make any amount of sense.**_ _I met the Joker and lived?_ _ **I sat up and saw a man's suit jacket slide from my shoulders and onto my purple comforter. The quality so fine the silver looked so sparkly, even with flecks of what I assume is blood, is on it. I slowly nodded. I was attacked after I left the club my roommate, which I still didn't see, left me at. I was then saved by the Joker, of all people, and he shot my attacker in front of me. He then walked me to the subway station. I paused looking around strangest night in Gotham ever? Definitely. I looked around most of my belongings were already packed in preparation for a move after graduation. My biggest items were already at my new apartment everything except the essentials which I head left out. I sighed pulling out my already planned outfit and headed to the showers. Tomorrow I stated my internship at Blackgate Prison. I carefully picked up the jacket and slipped it onto my only hanger that I had left after I got back. I pulled it closer my hands smoothing over the fine material and his scent drifted up from it. A husky smell like explosions and a husky smell I couldn't really place. I glanced at my phone 15 minutes to get to the ceremony, I huffed and finished as quick as possible before touching the jacket once more and heading into the world.**_


	2. Something Final

_**2 Years Later**_

 _ **It was late, I already knew that when I grabbed my bag that I kept by the door for nights just like this. It was really late or really early depending on how you looked at the clock 3.25a.m. blinked back at me when I had woken but moments ago from a dream of that night. It wasn't a nightmare not then and still not now. Yes, I saw a man die in front of me, did that make it nightmare, no. It had the Joker in it, did that make it a nightmare, no. I came home in the morning covered in brain and blood, maybe that made it nightmarish. I'm not sure. All I know is that in the 2 years since I had met the Joker I hadn't once ran into him again. That wasn't a problem, per se, just… I feel like I, for the briefest moment, had been given a glimpse into his life and now was an outsider once again.**_

 _ **I slid down the stairs with the quiet ease of repetition, and quietly walked over to my bike. My treasure, a splurge that I still didn't regret, I slid onto the gorgeous custom painted Black Harley Davidson red diamonds decorated the simple glossy black. I revved the engine lightly causing her to growl hungrily back at me before taking off and heading to the gym.**_

 _ **I parked at the front and headed in, the night watch man nodding at me silently. I acknowledged him and headed to the gym slipping into my simple leotard and grabbed my phone. I plugged it into the speaker system they used during the day and put on a loud bass filled playlist. An all night gym was exceedingly empty at 4 a.m. I stretched and pulled limbering up my muscles for the routine I had been playing over in my mind. It wasn't long before my body was obeying without hesitation I simply allowed myself to be lost. These late nights might have to cease after I start my new job. Arkham Asylum hired me almost as soon as I put in my application, 2 years of Blackgate and I was bored. Beyond bored, I was tired. I enjoyed my job, I really did, but there was no challenge left to it. The prisoners had one of four different issues. I would miss some of them, yes, but not enough to stay. I wanted challenge. Working at a prison for 2 years gave me knowledge and experience that I hadn't had before graduation. I was to be at Arkham in 3 hours or rather 2 now. I understood security risk and protocol. I had started on the career path to be a psychiatrist because it challenged the mind, it was the most difficult fields of study you can get into. That also why I started the gymnastics up again. After a few session long arguments with my therapist I had agreed. My father had been the one to push me into it. He had drove me harder than any coach and finally at 16 he demanded that I drop out so I could go full time. I had stood up and said no. I was already taking AP courses in everything I could plus senior level in what I couldn't I was going to graduate at the end of the year anyways why not wait. He yelled and screamed arguing his point and I had quit. My body had protested the denial of exercise even to the point before I started, and my mind missed the challenge of new routines but I had stood firm on this.**_

 _ **After everything he did, despite the physical need to do more, I hadn't wanted to start up again. But my therapist had told me" Make it your own, don't compete or do. It's now your choice, your father, may have pushed you into it but you can make it into your own. In this way at least take back your own freedom, your own power, your own life." I had looked for a twenty four seven gym, bought a membership and not looked back. I felt my body rejoice in the stretching muscles, my worries disappeared and my mind went blank. I allowed my body to feel.**_

 _ **All to soon I was headed to the shower and home to change. I headed up the stairs and changed into the most professional outfit I could pull from goodwill's racks. I packed my heels into my bag and slipped on the thick leather boots. I hurried through traffic and was quickly upon the gate surrounding Arkham island. I snagged my I.D. badge from my jacket and headed into the island slowly the whole of it more overwhelming than Blackgate ever could be.**_

 _ **The building had been designed in the 1920's when the asylum had been a place for legalized torture of the mentally disturbed. The practices seemed to have leaked into the very grounds. The electroshock therapy, water torture, lobotomy, any excuse to harm people, to test on the defenseless. The structures were gothic designed to warn and to keep in.**_

 _ **This was what I had spent so much time training for. I had worked to get to Arkham. This place, these people, the truest challenge of the mind. To help those who couldn't grasp the world, those who couldn't find themselves in the darkness of their own mind. Where voices spoke to them, where many people resided in one single body, where they were so scared of the entire world they couldn't function. These were the people that I had trained to help.**_

 _ **I got off the bike and quickly exchanged shoes, patting my black slacks nervously, before heading in. I walked quickly to the receptionist in the center of the hall, my heels clacking loudly in the tiled area, bouncing off high ceiling.**_

 _ **The women stared hard at me before looking down at a folder in front of her. "You Dr. Quinzel?" She asked pointedly staring at my kitten heels. I smiled quickly and offered my hand to her. "Yes. And you are?" "You're late. The director is through the double doors to the left. Here is your pass to get through main security. And my name is Tanya Deville. A little side note doctor it would be best if you didn't wear heels here. I'm sure you'll understand." She said quickly before dismissing me without another word.**_ _Well that was amazing. Not_ _ **.**_

 _ **I quickly walked through the double doors. The feel of something final when they flopped into place. Maybe something was decided. Some piece clicked itself into place.**_


	3. The Joker

3 months

Already I was in the swing of things, I had proven myself to the director early on and he had seen fit to grace me with the truly challenging cases. Such as Pamela Isley or as she prefers Ivy. He had handed me the case after a week of me asking for a challenge. Turns out all of her previous doctors were male and she happen to take a liking to me. I looked forward to our sessions together, it was like a girl time. We got along so well, it was sad I got along better with my patients than the other doctors here. Most were middle aged, arrogant, and felt they were superior to women.

I also had sessions with "Dr." Johnathon Crane. He was, to put it in a polite way, an arrogant asshole. Sarcastic attitude, quick wit and yet I looked forward to his sessions as well as he challenged me. Then there was Two-Face, Harvey Dent, he didn't talk a lot except about Pamela Isley who he wanted so bad I felt bad for him. After my star studded roster I had 3 unknowns. Tanya a Schizophrenic alcoholic, Guy a paranoid kleptomaniac, and Tommy a survivor who has regressed to his childhood. Today I had Tanya Pamela and Tommy. Every week I alternated Which People I had Today, Monday, I would have Pamela, Tanya, and Tommy Monday, Friday, and Wednesday while I had Two-Face, Crane, and Guy on Tuesday and Thursday. I always enjoyed that I only had 6 patients to work with some doctors had 4 a day and a different 4 every day. I had gotten to know my patients perhaps and I generally enjoyed there company save for Guy. Unfortunately he creeped me out, I couldn't explain why, just a feeling.

I walked into my session with Tanya, happy yet I could tell she was not in the mood for chipper. " Good Moring Tanya. I heard you got your hands on some mouth wash over the weekend." " Yeah, the buzz ain't worth this." I stared at her. She was looking rough, shaking from detox, smelled like vomit a sickly pale complexion that looked made her look worse, if that was even possible. " Tanya, I know fresh breath is all the rage but you say it wasn't worth it. Do you believe given the chance you wouldn't do I again?" She was quiet thinking it over before shrugging. "Don't matter, they got me on suicide watch and solitaire." I shook my head." That's not what I asked." "Don't matter." She stubbornly insisted. "If you can detox and commit to your rehabilitation program you could be out of here in 6 months. Why do you insist on this 'Don't matter' crap when you know it does. You have family waiting on you out there. You have people that want to be there for you." 'I ain't got nothing waiting out there for me. They put me in here. It doesn't matter what they want. It only matters what I want and they doesn't deserve to have me in there life after all this. They don't care any more than you do. NOBODY FUCKING CARES! NO ONE YOU ALL WANT TO GET ME." I pressed the panic button before walking over to her and lightly motioning for her to sit. She shook her head and ran to the corner grasping at the cinder blocks of the session room. She started muttering to herself. " _They don't care. They've never cared. They don't care."_ The guards burst in. "Doctor Quinzel?" "Over here. She threw up her medications. Put her in isolation till the fever breaks." I said calmly. "Gently." I added quietly over my shoulder as I strode out of the room.

I headed into the group therapy session that was currently on going in a communal area. I sat at the outer edge of the circle and watched no body questioning my presence as I didn't come to interfere or take part. I allowed myself to cool the adrenaline racing through my veins. All to soon I was up walking back to my office for my session with Tommy. I finished our session without any issue and sat at the computer sending emails and typing up reports of my patients progress. Glancing at the time I hurried to the cafeteria that was shared by patients and doctors alike. It wasn't much but the food was decent for it being from an asylum. I sat of to the side and observed the interactions, humor danced across my features as I watched the doctors almost huddle in groups, as if crazy was catching. The patient were mostly drugged out of there mind. I watched as a patient wandered a bit to close to one of said groups, quickly a guard was guiding him back to the open areas. I shook my head and savored my grape flavored soda. No caffeine aloud here, yet I wanted the sugar in my system. I munched on my slightly wilted salad before munching quickly and hurrying back to my desk. Within moments of me sitting down a guard was leading Pamela in for her session. She sat down with relative ease and quickly leaned forward. " Hey sweet stuff, whatcha up to?' I shook my head giggling at her manner. I liked talking to Ivy and had done what I could to convince her to be calm so she could have rec time. The day finished on a good note and I enjoyed the ride home carrying with me a new file. One Edward Nygma, otherwise known as The Riddler, he was known to be obsessed with riddles and out smarting everyone else in the room. I sat in my loft apartment and poured myself a glass of wine and sipped on it while watching the evening news. The news caster slipped on a picture of the Batman and the Joker saying they were sighted tearing apart downtown in a high speed chase and to stay in doors. I couldn't help the snort that came out. There were always idiots that would go out just to get pictures of both of them. Or I heard even groupies of both trying to help there party. I shut off the news and switched on my Bluetooth speaker on and flicked through the file. I believe that this would most definitely be interesting that was sure.

1 month later

I moaned slightly as I had just smacked my head a slight bit to hard into my desk. I thought back to that night in my apartment but a month a ago, my enthusiasm for my newest case, my excitement at exploring the newest extreme personality to Arkham. I shook my head in disappointment though I'm not sure if it was at myself or the villain that had left my office but moments ago. I sighed and rubbed my forehead, exhaustion creeping in, before moving over to dinosaur of a computer that Arkham somehow keep alive and pulled up my email.

 _Director Arkham I would appreciate a moment of your time at your earliest convenience -Dr. Quinzel_

I sent the email before heading to lunch, hopefully he would get back to me soon. If I had to spend another session with the Riddler I may get a cell in black gate for murder. I hurriedly ate my salad and walked back to my office stopping only to buy a grape soda before sitting back at my desk. I was in luck he had already emailed back.

 _Ms. Quinzel,_ ( I rolled my eyes at the Ms. Like most of the men here at Arkham, he didn't believe this was a field for women.) _I would be happy to meet with you today at 1 p.m. Please respond by 12.30. -Dr. Arkham, Head Director of Arkham Asylum._

I glanced at the time 12.25 . I quickly responded saying I would meet him at his office. And waited impatiently. I was still trying to recover from the session earlier. Oh little doc, what would be a click if it had no hands nor numbers?. That was his question all session repeating it and repeating it. Ahhh! He smiled, grinned, sneered, and his only other comments asking if I knew the answer yet. I glanced at the computer clock 15 minutes. I slowly got up and headed to the other end of the far administration building wing.

I knocked on the wooden door that led to his office. Dr. Arkham opened the door quickly and pointed to the seat in front of his large mahogany desk. "Ms. Quinzel to what do I owe this surprise?" "Dr. Arkham" I gritted out. "I was wondering if I may speak frankly about something with you." "But of course." "Very well, I want to know if I could perhaps take on a different case, than the Riddler." " You mean trade cases of someone else?" " That would be most preferable." " Well Ms. Quinzel I seem to recall you asking for a challenge which is why you were assigned Mr. Nygma." " Yes, sir. However in the months time of sessions I honestly don't believe I have done even the smallest bit of good with him. I believe that even if I were on his case for 6 months time he nor I would benefit from it. I propose that he be moved to another doctor and perhaps take on one of their case or even take on a whole new patient." " Hmmm, well we did just get a new patient in last night. Would that suffice?" " Yes, thank you so much." " Don't thank me yet Ms. Quinzel. Our new patient is one of the most notorious housed here at Arkham Asylum. Well housed when he's caught and he breaks out every time." " And who is that?" Dr. Arkham picked up a large series of folders and plopped them down on the front of his desk. "So are you agreeing to take on this patient?", he said holding his hand down on the folders I had reached for. "Yes, Dr. Arkham. May I be privy to who I'll be treating?" I asked annoyed at his insistent. He looked at me and simply said The Joker.

 _A/N sorry it took so long for it to get moving I just wanted to establish her sanity and her personality._


	4. Our First Session

That night

I stared at my kitchen island. It was covered in just one of the folders that Dr. Arkham had given me on The Joker. There was so much on him, over 77 years of history was given to me in folders. I had at least 2 folders full just the first 50 or so crimes spread out in a sort of timeline. The Joker couldn't be the 90 year old and yet the crimes were the same. Well not the same but, the objective the same. Lure batman in by causing mayhem, killing civilians, pranks on steroids, a fight and sometimes he got away sometimes he was captured and sent to Arkham. The face and makeup the same, he was notorious not only as a Villain to batman's superhero, but also as a gangster. Hell, the man ruled a good portion of Gotham. The only true rivals to him was Maroni and the word was out that he was even scared of Joker. Then again how do you not be scared of the Joker, he was chaos embodied.

My first session with him wasn't for 2 days. I had 2 days for pouring over every inch of these reports. I even had a few sessions recorded from previous doctors. I wanted to know him. What his story is, what makes these terrible things that he does so thrilling for him. I don't believe it was simply because he thrived on being unpredictable or just to kill, I wanted to know why? Why, that ever present question about him that has circled around in my mind ever since that encounter years ago. But I'm not obsessing over him I just want to know.

I glanced over at the clock on the oven. 2.35 a.m. blinks back at me. I sigh and stack all the papers in a sort of organized chaos and head to bedroom forgoing the pajamas and flop into bed. I slid around on my purple sheets trying to ignore the photos that flashed behind my eyelids and allow myself to slip into sleep.

Beep beep….Beep Beep…BEEP beep…..BEEP BEEP…..BEEP BEEP!

I jerked up right in bed and smashed my small alarm clock into the wall. It beeped once more but otherwise quieted. Sighing heavily I went to shower the remnants of not only a few hours sleep but also the feelings left from a dream, that try as I might I cant for the life of me remember. Nothing but cackling and excitement, anticipation of the best kind, it all swirled in my stomach begging to be released. However I had a full plate today and still more research to do on the Joker, my exercise would have to wait.

Quickly enough I was bouncing around my apartment fully dressed save for my, apparently, signature heels and eating a pudding cup while keeping an ear out for the weather. I flipped through one of the folders I had yet to get to and frowned at the picture. It was a mug shot, Joker was holding his plaque, seemingly quite pleased with himself, smiling like the mad man he was. The papers underneath however were more disturbing . Detailed records of electro shock therapy, lists upon lists of drug prescriptions some even in doses that should've killed him, behavioral injection, experimentation even. He had survived all this and this was some of the older stuff, not including anything more recent than 15 years ago.

He should be over a hundred years old or dead or rotting at least yet he was young and vibrant. Whatever happened to him has enabled him to be around this long and undergo this much over dosage of basically every mental illness drug under the sun is, in a way, a fountain of youth. Batman was the same as well or near enough that anyone could tell. Did the same thing happen to him? I mean just about anyone could undergo something traumatic and survive but every single person will react different, I mean we can generalize certainly but everyone has their own unique ticks. Their very own way of handling it. It's a possibility that they both had undergone the same trauma but I highly doubt it.

I glance over at the clock, and jerked in surprise. I easily bounced into my bedroom and grabbed my bag and shoes before locking up and running down to my bike. Easily slipping through traffic and revving the engine I arrived at work with a few minutes to spare. The guards nodded to me and I slipped into a spot before changing shoes and heading to my office.

I stared at Pam as she went over yet another reason why the Joker was the biggest jackass ever and why I shouldn't agree to treat him. "He's a clown, Harleen, a fucking clown. How fucking stupid can you get, to dress up like a fucking clown and allow yourself to be called Joker. I mean I know he has everyone scared of him but not me. He's just another male ego with something to prove. I know you hate Riddler but at least you'll live tomorrow if you smart off to him. I can't tell you how many times he has polluted everything around him. Just don't." "Pam, breathe. He's just another patient and that's how I'll treat him. He gets off on being treated special and in the lime light. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to be scared away from him. He's a challenge but also he's a mystery. Imagine if I were to crack him, I would-" "You won't crack him. No one can crack him. There's nothing to crack, cause there isn't anything in there. There's no real purpose behind anything he does. He prefers to shoot everyone then cackle at the bodies. There's nothing under the green hair. So just let it go." " Pam I know you care about me, but no. I'm not letting this go."

Pam session her hands and the table around paced around the room. I watched her even aggravated her movements were still graceful her green toned skin somewhat dull due to no direct sunlight but her eyes showed the fire that blazed inside her. She shrugged after a few moments of pacing before flopping back onto the couch I had inside my office. "Harley, you're being stupid." She sighed out.

I couldn't help the giggle that slipped out. She glanced at me before swiftly turning away but not before I saw the small smile on her lips. " What do you hope to know? I mean the only way you'll get him to tell you anything is to confuse him." "What do you mean?" "He's going to take you for an easily manipulated blonde bimbo, just like everyone does." I glares at her. I know my looks don't help people see my intelligence even Pam believed me to be a ditz on first glance but I've already prove to her that I'm not. I raised an eyebrow silently in challenge. "You're very first impression is going to dictate everything, more so than anyone else. You have to make yourself stand out in a way that is true to you. He thrives on false impressions, so make him look." " Well I'm screwed anyways then. We've already met. I mean he might not recognize me. It was a while ago-" "When did you two meet?" "He's saved me." I simply said. Pam hiked her own eyebrow up but shook her head. A guard knocked on my door then let himself in. " Times up." He growled out before roughly cuffing her. I frowned at his treatment. "Easy with my patient. " I told him sharply. He looked over at me before shaking his head but guided rather than shoved Pam out into the hall.

After Pam's warning the rest of the day was quiet whether it was because I was preoccupied with what she told me or that everyone else was generally calm. I left right after my last session and headed straight to the gym.

I walked in and changed quickly, falling easily into a sort of routine only this time with my headphones. I warmed up quickly while waiting on the uneven bars to be free. After the coach and young girl left I walked over and allowed my body to move effortlessly while my mind wandered.

So many things I could do, but Pam said I had to be true to myself. I know I was stubborn, sarcastic, sassy, as my mom had said. How could I meet the Joker like that and live till the end of the session. He didn't like hero's or people sticking up for others I didn't want to be typical doctor.

I flipped onto the shorter bar before executing a perfect back flip and settling on the near by mat to stretch. Perhaps I could b silent, no I shook my head. I couldn't handle quiet. He was egotistical and a narcissist, he demanded your attention.

I ordered delivery Chinese food and hauled home, not paying attention to the cars or the scenery passing by merely enjoying the wind in my hair. I beat the delivery person to the apartment and I quickly changed.

I got home and paid for my food. Afterwards I jumped in the shower listening to my radio playing all sorts of songs. _Wonder what kind of music Joker likes? Maybe he likes fast pace or 80s rock._ I bounced on the balls of my feet while I rinsed off. _Maybe I could ask during one of our sessions?_ _HOLY SHIT!_

I could set up everything as a music test. That's unique. Our music choices say a lot about our personalities for example if you like country it means you like simple things in life or you yearn for the simple life.

I wrapped the towel around my hair and ran for my phone. I had a lot to be doing. I stayed up until 330 in the morning downloading music and play lists. I had Joker first thing after lunch, then I had my first group therapy sessions all my patients except Joker.

All too soon my alarm clock was beeping at me, I hurriedly got dressed and double checked that I had my Bluetooth speaker as well as my duo headset. I dressed in a new blouse I had recently bought, a simple button up that was a rich purple and flared out. I paired it with some plain black tights and a black pencil skirt, simple but still not quite business like heels.

I headed out and stopped for a coffee. I had them put it in my travel cup and stashed it in a cup holder in my saddlebag. At the gate I stopped and dug into my bag while the guard waited. The gourd must be new because most of the guards already knew me. "I heard it's going to rain later." He said pleasantly. "Oh, well a little water never killed anyone." I replied while still digging. "I like the bike. Nice paint job and nice pipes, nothing to over the top but not subtle either." "Thank you. Little bit of work and a little more than a bit of money." I said finally snagging my badge which had been underneath the only Joker folder I had brought with me. He nodded after checking the id and I parked as close to the building and put a trash bag over my seat.

Already I was beyond nervous I still had to get through Guy and Dent. As I waited for Dent to be brought over I flipped through more music. I had any genre I could possibly think of country, rock, classical, pop, bluegrass, banjo, folk, rap, reggae, opera, Electronica, alternative, classic rock, 70s, 50s, I mean everything. This is something I've never heard of doing but always wanted to do, it wasn't going to answer any real questions about him but it might just peak his interest.

The morning sessions passed without incident and I slowly walked to lunch. All through lunch I sat taping my heel against my own chair, not bothering with getting a can of pop caffeine wouldn't help today.

I left the lunch room early so I could set everything up. By time my nervous fiddling allowed me to get the wires sorted it was 5 minutes till time. I looked around the session room, all my other sessions have been in my office but not the Joker, it came with a panic button on the bottom side of the steel table and I had been given a tazer.

A guard looked in and noticed me, "You Quinzel?" "Dr. Quinzel, you?" "Mr. Kobe. He's ready out here just checking to make sure there was nothing in here dangerous." He looked me up and down before turning and looking at the speakers before walking back out and nodding the other 3 people inside.

A guard on each side of him both with other a hand on his shoulders guiding him into the bolted down chair. I ignored him as I waited on the guards to leave. Two stopped on either side of the door and stood. Frowning I said, "I'll be fine you can leave. Shaking their heads "Ma'am we can't." Yes you can and will. Now go. " I said before turning my back on them and fiddled with my notepad and phone. I heard them sigh but they stepped out and closed the door.

"Now, I've decided to do something I don't think any of your other psychiatrist have done. I'm not expecting you to cooperate but It'd be nice. If not, well no bother I can catch up on my paperwork.

I walked to my side of the table got the Playlist started. Sitting down, I looked up and saw him watching me. His predatory eyes following the slightest move or twitch, he seemed to be questioning me, wondering at my strategy. He smiled and nodded towards the speakers, I smiled back at him enjoying the way his eyes sparkled.

His grin turned predatory like as he tilted his head toward the sound of smooth jazz flowing out of the little box. "Ah, the sound of the South." He whispered pleasantly. I noted a check and changed to the next, a simple classical flute to which he shrugged and so on it went neither of us said any more the only sound permeating the room was from the speaker.

The only change was when bluegrass jangled out of the speaker and his face twisting with disgust, I couldn't hold back the giggle at that.

His eyes held mine hostage at the sound and the tension in the room tightened. After a few nerve wracking moments he closed his eyes to the alternative rock now playing.

All to soon the final track was played and we had 10 minutes left of our session. I glanced up at him meeting his eyes before going back to my notes. Satisfied with his general cooperation, I smiled at him and stored the speaker and notes back in my bag. He had been a little to cooperative, almost disappointed me in a way but I think I actually threw him for a loop.

I looked back at him to see him staring at me. "Any questions for me?" I asked as I slid the last paper into my bag. "Yeah." I nodded at him to continue. "You look a little young to be a therapist, so whose rod did you butter to get here?" I rolled my eyes "Don't do that pumpkin, it's rude." He hissed out quietly. "I'm sorry, but you're not the first to assume that. All anyone ever sees is a blonde ditz." I said irritated. I shook my head and walked over to his side of the table and leaning down next to his ear. " Maybe you shouldn't expect me to be like all the rest." I walked around the table and sat back down and stared him in the eye. It started off as a point, but I got lost in his eyes. Deep grey eyes that revealed an inner fire that burned so hot it was white. It was like looking directly into chaos, the center of the storm and it's windy and turbulent edges at the same time. A knock made me jump, unknowingly I had leaned across the table and so had he, and I slid back into my chair as the guards came back in. He stood and walked to the door before turning and laughing. The laugh that settled into the bones. "You know Doc, I got another question. What do you get when you have a girl, a thing, and an alley?" I paused, perhaps he did recognize me, before replying " Ah dead thug, a savior, and a girl who remembered how to laugh." He nodded pleasantly, "How'd you know?" He turned and laughed. "Come on boys quit drooling over my doctor she's a tease. Let's go I here there playing music." He walked down the hall and the guards ran to catch up.

So ended my very first session with the joker.

A/N I apologize this tool so long. I tried to make it a bit longer to make up for it. RL got into the way then I got sick but instead of staying home I worked through it. Ugh. Again sorry I'm going to try to update soon. Thanks again for reading. Oh and disclaimer of always forget don't own this wish I did.


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